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Once upon a time there was a lovely little sausage called Baldrick, and he lived happilly ever after.
Nah, in all seriousness. I'm me. You know me. I'm Old Gregg. I do watercolours. Well, ok, not really, though I do dabble in photography. I am Sir Didymus - a fully fledged vinyl junkie Scorpio. I was meant to be a twin, but the world couldn't handle two of me, and the spirit of my brother decided instead to enter the body of Basil Brush, popular children's entertainer - which explains why he started out scraggy and posh, then turned fat and camp. My fault. Won't happen again. Meanwhile, the resulting clusterfuck that became me continues to amuse and bemuse people to this very day.
I'm apparently of average height and average build - though in recent times I seem to be lumbered with a bit of a podge. My hair is long, blonde and just on the wrong side of cool. The colour of my eyes is best described as Noop Green, which is appropriate, as Rufus the Noop from "The Dreamstone" is one of a myriad of small furry critters I apparently resemble. Most people seem compelled to hug me as if I'm a teddy bear, and I'm not adverse to these moments provided they don't smell of wee.
I have mild OCD, and have been known to have a panic attack over a sticker not peeling off cellophane properly. Mental. I salute magpies whenever I see them. I also have a penchant for Captain Morgan's rum, Southern Comfort, vodka of any variety, and a strong dose of absinthe. Sometimes all of them at once, depending on my mood that day, and the general availability of alcohol at that moment in time. My liver may disagree with this blatant destruction, but my brain doesn't. Possibly because I've killed the braincells that would disagree via the number of personal injuries I've sustained over the years.
I also think you can 100% judge a person on what they think of Batman - if they don't think he's clearly the greatest superhero of all time, they're probably pure evil. And totally wrong, of course.
"Now, what I want you to do is look at the picture of the kittens in a barrel. Look at them. They're having a whale of a time. They're all happy. Haha.
The one on the left's Phillip. Look at Phillip's eyes. Whenever you feel angry, I want you to look at Phillip. Your anger will recede like an ocean.
That'll be 159 Euros."
The one on the right must be called Collins. Its sort of drunken law. Don't ask. Anyhew, that's all I have to say right now.
![See~Hear~Say no Evil [M]](https://userimages03-akm.imvu.com/productdata/images_afc1ddbfb1046f4b58f42f5097f06def.gif "See~Hear~Say no Evil [M]"){kind=small}
